There is no one ‘right’ method to have sex, and it is crucial to keep this in mind as everyone’s sexual experience is different, advises Sybil Shiddell, country manager India, Gleeden, a discreet extramarital dating Web site.
First-time sex is an intense and intimate experience that can be both thrilling and nerve-wracking.
Many people enthusiastically look forward to it, but it can also be filled with sexual tension and unreasonably high expectations.
A potent emotional concoction can be produced when personal fears are combined with the pressure from society to live up to preconceived expectations of what the experience should be like.
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Knowledge of Sexual Anxiety
1. Social Expectations
Social expectations are one of the main causes of sexual anxiety.
Unrealistic representations of sex that may not reflect reality can be produced by the media, peer pressure, and cultural standards.
There is no one ‘right’ method to have sex, and it is crucial to keep this in mind as everyone’s sexual experience is different.
2. Self-Image Issues
Sexual anxiety can be significantly influenced by problems with body image.
Self-consciousness over one’s looks might make it difficult to unwind and savour the moment.
It’s important to keep in mind that beauty comes in many different forms, and that a strong sexual relationship is based more on emotional compatibility and trust than it is on outward appearance.
3. Pressure to Perform
The fear of failing to perform admirably or live up to a partner’s expectations can be crippling.
It’s critical to be open with your partner and recognise that new experiences are a learning process for everyone involved.
Perfection is not necessary.
How to Control Sexual Anxiety
1. Open Communication
Tell your partner about your worries and hopes.
Developing trust and reducing fear can both be accomplished by open and honest communication.
Do not forget that your lover is probably feeling the same way.
2. Educate Yourself
Information is empowering. Spend some time learning about sexual health, consent, and the fundamentals of sexual behaviour.
Anxiety can be reduced by comprehending the processes and the significance of permission.
3. Set Reasonable Expectations
Be aware that your first experience with sex might not be mind-blowing, and that’s okay.
With more experience and understanding with your partner’s preferences, sex becomes more enjoyable.
4. Create a Comfortable Environment
Opt for a private, cosy environment for your first sex. Both couples may feel more at ease in a calm setting.
How to Handle Disappointments
Recognising that disappointments could occur before, during, or after your first sexual experience is vital.
Consider these events as significant opportunities for learning and personal development rather than seeing them as failures.
1. Aftercare
Spend some time cuddling and reassuring one another after sex.
Regardless of any mishaps during the act, this emotional connection can make both parties feel supported and cared for.
2. Reflect and Learn
If disappointments occur, consider the situation without blaming anyone. Instead, talk about what you both liked or what could be better.
Over time, a sexual relationship can become more satisfying through learning from each encounter.
3. Consult a Professional
Getting advice from a therapist or counsellor who focuses on sexual health can be incredibly helpful if sexual anxiety lingers or overwhelms you.
They can provide you advice on how to control your anxiousness and enhance your sexual experiences.
It’s normal to be worried about having your first sexual experience because it’s such a big deal in your life.
However, one can embark on a successful and rewarding sexual journey by comprehending and controlling sexual fear, establishing reasonable expectations, and viewing setbacks as chances for personal development.
Always keep in mind that sex is a profoundly personal and dynamic experience, and that developing a solid emotional bond with your partner based on communication, trust, and respect is of utmost importance.
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Feature Presentation: Ashish Narsale/Rediff.com
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